The Silent Treatment
The Silent Treatment
Having those “tough talks,” those emotionally charged conversations about issues both in and out of school, does not always come easy for parents, particularly when you have a child whose automated response is to give the silent treatment.
As a parent, perhaps you feel a great deal of frustration when your child is in “silent treatment mode.” Frustration grows because your child is cutting you off from understanding his or her thoughts and feelings. While it may also feel hurtful that your child is not wishing to communicate out loud, you should not take this response personally.
In reality, your child is trying to communicate with you through nonverbal cues. This shutdown mode can say several things
Let your child have some time to process. What does this look like?
If the situation calls for punishments, you can still reiterate to your child that poor choices were made and therefore there are consequences. However, you want to also give him/her a moment to sit with feelings and thoughts so that a conversation can be had a later time. Reiterate that while he/she may need some time to just be silent, the issue will be addressed and not ignored. If your child still refuses to talk after given some time to process, encourage him/ her to write in words his/her feelings. Writing letters or drawing can feel less threatening and often bring up a more detailed dialogue of the issue at hand. Lastly, avoid asking the question why? The word why to a child often feels like they are the problem. Instead you can use questions like
For additional resources on how to support your child through difficult conversations refer to these links!
http://living.thebump.com/react-sons-silent-treatment-12885.html
https://www.todaysparent.com/kids/preschool/silent-treatment-survival-guide/